Likes Facebook but no friends needed

Ben Wiczouk of somewhere in Montana (nearest town not divulged) has made the briefest of contacts with the outside world to reveal he has signed up with Facebook for the first time. The story was broken in the Liberty County Times by investigative journalist Ramon Aguirra. Ben, who until now has cut himself off from all electronic communication, conceded that 1.5bn Facebook users can't be wrong. He has decided to put his head above the parapet, if only very slightly. 'Given my constant conflict between paranoia and narcissism I've decided to try to integrate the two disorders by accessing Facebook.’ However, Ben has severely restricted the settings on his Facebook page. For example, for ‘Posts’ he has disallowed ‘Public’ access and even access by ‘Friends’, instead ticking the box for ‘Only Me’. For 'Who Can See My Stuff’ his setting is the same - 'Only Me'. ‘I’m finding my own posts very absorbing and see no reason to share them with a bunch of other nosy ignoramuses.’ Ben has made a big concession on the ‘Who Can Contact Me’ tab by allowing ‘Only Friends of Friends’. However, he will not be making any friends on Facebook and will not respond to any friendship requests. 'I've gone public on this so that everyone out there looking to make contact with me, for whatever reason (and there are all sorts of weirdos out there with all sorts of reasons), will know that they will not be hearing from me.’ Ben debated whether to post a photo of himself or possibly someone else, or even and animal or bush, but eventually decided against any of these. ‘If I want to look at myself I can easily just walk over to the nearby stream.’ And he definitely will not be listing his high school or home town. ‘There's no way I want any of those losers to contact me. I'm happy here with my gold bars and baked beans and nobody's gonna come and take that happiness away from me.’